Not New Landscapes, But New Eyes
"The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes."
–Marcel Proust
This pandemic has, at least for me, been a time of seeing the same landscape over and over, and honestly getting pretty sick of it.
Same house, day after day, ugh.
Same people, no escape.
Same activities, and none of the ones I really am itching to be able to do.
No wonder the tendrils of depression and despair have been creeping back into my psyche.
Now that I've realized that that's been happening, what can I do about it?
If I can't literally find new landscapes right now, can I look at my current one with a fresh lens? With new eyes, as Proust says?
What if I could see my child's behaviors as release valves of tension, as bids for connection?
What if I could view my 6 year old's continuous mouth sounds as echolocation, as ways he feels safe and able to use his voice?
What if I could learn to view any difficult emotion that bubbles up as energetic fuel that can be used to propel me toward my intentions and values and choices, rather than as something that's "disrupting my peace" (read: shaking up my sense of numbness)?
What if I could see the fullness of my impact on my son NOT as a burden (the pressure of knowing he's always watching me, seeing my mistakes, etc.), but rather as an empowering gift?
Listen--This is a battle for me, moment by moment. But I have spent the last near-decade honing my use of the Nurtured Heart Approach® lens, and it has made a critical impact in how I am able to function (even, dare I say it, *grow*) during these times.
The NHA® teaches not only how to view your child's behavior in a new way, but also how to get crystal clear about our values and intentions so we can use *any* intensity that comes our way (from our child, from our partner, from the world, from within) in transformative ways.
It's not about expending yet more energy on learning just another parenting technique.
It's about looking at how we're *already* spending our energy in any given moment, and getting purposeful about where we want to be directing it instead.
